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The 5 People on Facebook During a Blizzard

Even the most hardy of New England folk have their limits, and blizzard conditions yielding close to two feet of snow tends to be the line. School and work are simply not an option which means the day is open to hot chocolate, movies and Facebook. However, every snow storm seems to have its handful of serial posters that you have most likely experienced during your social media career. Those people can be narrowed down into five categories:

The Weatherman

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These posters become active during the lull before the storm, keeping us updated hourly on the impending weather doom. As the snow continues to pile and power goes down across the state, you will never want for a news reporter; your friendly Facebook weatherman has you covered.

Related Post: “Looks like we are gonna get about 13 inches before noon, then it will slow down to a light dusting.”

The Photographer

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Artistic or not, several Facebookers fall into this category during a blizzard. Giving a picture to the Weatherman’s statement they tirelessly upload snow-covered trees, houses and pets in the case that you are unable to look out a window and see it for yourself. They rank among the greatest staters-of-the-obvious, except, of course, when a black and white filter is added. Then their work is fit for a museum.

Related Post: “Holy Snow Batman!” *iPhone picture of car blanketed by snow*

The Old Crab

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 Many of us have at least a couple older family members as friends on Facebook. When they are not sabotaging witty, sarcastic posts with comments like “Oh that’s cute sweetheart, how are your parents?”, they can often be found telling us how hard they had it. Even in blizzard conditions there will be posts reminiscing times of “treacherous walks to school uphill, both ways, in the snow, with handmade snowshoes.”

Related Post: “We didn’t have snow days when I was in school. We geared up and skied right to first period. Kids these days.”

The Adventurer

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The child in all of us may look out at the towering snow and envision frolicking through powdery fluffiness, but only a few will actually suit up. And don’t think they are going to just enjoy going outside either; they will bring high-powered Nikon cameras to document their excursion. Remember: if you don’t post it, it didn’t happen.

Related Post: “Not gonna let the snow get me down!!!” *Multiple emojis with picture of a person blanketed by snow.”

The Angry Reader

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After a couple hours of relentless bombardment of snow posts, we all tend to fall into this category. At one point even the cutest picture of a dog with booties and a jacket prancing through the snow has become overdone. This is also about the time you should give up on Facebook until the roads are plowed, then wait another couple days.

Related Post: “You live in New England and winter is here. ENOUGH WITH THE SNOW POSTS!!!”

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